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queer junk for straight edges

by Louna Elbe

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1.
a wise man once said « the early bird catches the worm » but i was born with shattered wings that wise man just said « find a hole that’s soft and warm and bury yourself along your belongings and bury yourself along your belongings » but i never owned anything i’m not home inside of my own skin a stranger’s shadow has wrapped itself around me but i never owned anything i’m not even home inside of my own skin i’m that stranger’s shadow that cannot be outrun and when i’m hurt it could hurt anyone an old legend says « all traditions getting lost we gotta find another anchor point » i can’t but abide by the rules – however much it cost, but assume that I could - then what’s the point? and my hands are too shy, and my eyes are too clean to mull over whatever could have been a stranger’s shadow hides the world away from me and my feet are so high, and my head is so wide that a thousand imps remain concealed inside i’m that stranger’s shadow that cannot be outrun and when i’m hurt it could hurt anyone and when i’m hurt it could hurt anyone but i never owned anything i’m not even home inside of my own skin i’m that stranger’s shadow that cannot be outrun and when i’m hurt it could hurt anyone and when i’m hurt it could hurt anyone and when i’m hurt it could hurt anyone a wise man once said « the early bird catches the worm » but i was born with shattered wings
2.
they tried to rip away my skirt told me i didn’t have the right once showed up with jeans and t-shirt and they mocked me throughout the night my whole body shaven i was told i was fake once showed up with my hairs on that was such a mistake « why do you always wear this wig? » well i’ll explain why i do that’s ‘cause your forehead is big and i don’t want to look like you « why always wear these beanies? » well i’ll explain why i do some others wear bikinis and i don’t want to be like you don’t even force me to like you don’t even force me to like you you can tease, you can boo you wish i was that insecure but i’m twice taller than you and i have nothing left to cure i’ll return blow for blow you wish i was that insecure but i’m that twice taller hoe and i will throw you through the door « why do you always wear this wig? » well i’ll explain why i do that’s ‘cause your forehead is big and i don’t want to look like you « why always wear these beanies? » well i’ll explain why i do some others wear bikinis and i don’t want to be like you singing my song ‘cause whatever i’ll do i’ll be wrong fuck you i am strong so much stronger than you you are wrong so fuck you « why do you always wear this wig? » well i’ll explain why i do that’s ‘cause your forehead is big and i don’t want to look like you why always wear these beanies? well i’ll explain why i do some other show their penis and i don’t want to be like you don't even force me to like you don't even force me to like you « why do you always wear this wig? » well i’ll explain why i do that’s ‘cause your forehead is big and i don’t want to look like you
3.
say goodbye to your inner child the devil has chosen you to enter the wild say farewell to your fathers in hell the devil has chosen you to confront the wild pack and get on the track no such thing as turning back when you enter the wild
4.
shades of suicide on every wall manifold dreams denied follow you through the hall hold on hold out stand your ground come on come out and make a sound shades of suicide in every room don’t let them trap you inside and give you their sense of doom hold on hold out stand your ground come on come out and make a sound you’re strong they won’t get you they’re wrong don’t be wrong too you’re strong they won’t get you they’re wrong don’t be wrong too shades of suicide on every wall manifold dreams denied follow you through the hall hold on hold out stand your ground come on come out and make a sound shades of suicide in every room don’t let them trap you inside and give you their sense of doom hold on hold out stand your ground come on come out and make a sound you’re strong they won’t get you they’re wrong don’t be wrong too you’re strong they won’t get you they’re wrong don’t be wrong too
5.
weak 04:57
thunder strikes again with the summer and the rain i feel no pain no true reason to complain yet fates beyond traits live for all but strength and treats i can’t explain why i feel so fucking weak week after week i still feel so fucking weak day after day all my dreams have flown away thunder strikes again but the memories remain a little sick of feeling so fucking weak week after week i still feel so fucking weak day after day all my dreams have flown away year after year still seems i don’t belong here week after week i still look so fucking bleak thunder strikes again but the memories remain a little sick of feeling so fucking weak day after day all my dreams have flown away week after week i still feel so fucking weak year after year still seems i don’t belong here week after week i still look so fucking bleak
6.
warmest wave 03:43
i’ve kept that phrase unclean from dust our best days are behind us all words unsaid suffocated our common world confiscated if you fall please don’t let go you’ve been my warmest wave for all i know how solitary will you live in shame which harsh memory got stuck to my name i’m carving in stone every trace of you as i leave alone still thinking of you if you fall please don’t let go you’ve been my warmest wave for all i know if you fall please don’t let go you’ve been my warmest wave for all i know
7.
fade away 06:59
i won’t go out tonight ‘cause i’m tired of being spat at i won’t go out tonight their words like flaming arrows and their nails like flickering claws their eyes like lurking shadows i won’t go out tonight my gaze filled with a bittersweet sight and too bad if i prove them right their hate flows in my veins and my heart pumps always in vain their hate will stay the same and i don’t have the right to hide out from your light fade away fade away and i don’t crave the plights of a part in your fights fade away fade away i won’t go out tonight ‘cause i’m tired of being spat at and too bad if i prove them right their words like flaming arrows and their nails like flickering claws their eyes like lurking shadows and i don’t have the right to hide out from your light fade away fade away and i don’t crave the plights of a part in your fights fade away fade away

credits

released February 28, 2023

Louna Elbe - vocals, guitar, programming
Shelby Cane - backing vocals
M. - guitar

thanks Bruit & Silences for the mastering!

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Louna Elbe Vannes, France

lonely girl wasting her time singing and playing guitar pretty badly in her bedroom

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